Well, I made the decision to let my husband come back home last Monday. I did stay in the guest room until Wednesday. The decision was complicated. He is trying very hard to show me he's changing, being very affectionate, going out of his way to show me how much he appreciates me. I found a therapist, I've seen her once already, he sees her later this week, then we'll go from there. I pray that he's truly willing to make the changes. We just hung out on Saturday, driving, ended up at the local outlet mall. As we were walking towards one store, we went by a Kay's jewelry store and he says lets go in. He decided he wanted to buy a diamond for me. We've been married 17 years and I didn't have one. We talked with the salespeople and came up with a design that I like, a price that I find reasonable, and it will match the wedding band (when I have it back on). At dinner, I asked him why he decided to do that. He said that it was kind of spur of the moment, but that he wanted me to know how serious he is. We started talking about renewing our vows, made a couple tentative plans. I need to talk to my high priestess and set up a time we can get together and talk about it a bit more.
Through all this, I still feel so guarded. That's a good thing, I think. I've asked him a time or two how long this will last, what happens when things go back to the way they were. He says he's going to do his best not to let that happen. Goddess, let it be so! I don't know how long it will be, if ever, till I trust him again. One day at a time, that's all I can deal with for now.
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